Relationships:Wilson's Thoughts
by Goodshipak
Summary: A companion piece to Inventory:House's Thoughts. Here is what Wilson is thinking after his kitchen discussion with House in Baggage. Season 6.


(These are Wilson's thoughts after his kitchen discussion with House about moving out. Set during Baggage in Season 6.)

Relationships:

Wilson's Thoughts

I had rehearsed it in my head all morning. How to approach it. What to say. Not that I was uncomfortable with House here. I mean, Sam has even said she likes him. Made me smile to hear that. But she's moving in. We need our privacy, time to get to know each other again. We don't need my big brother watching over our every move. Did I just say big brother? Odd that popped into my head. But I suppose it does fit. We laugh, we joke, we fight, we treat each other like family. But there comes a time when family moves out on their own. I think it's that time. House seems ready. He's back to his old self. Well except for the vicodin. I'm happy to see him drug free. And, okay, I'm proud of him too. Just don't tell him that, I'd NEVER live it down. I found him in the kitchen. Drinking orange juice. Out of the carton. If that were anyone else, I shudder to think. But for House, his drinking vessel of choice. I told him Sam was moving in and asked him what his plans were. He deflected of course, And then I just had to add 'in life' when referring to his plans. Where that came from, I still don't know. I sounded like a self help guru on late night TV. Geez! But I did also mention that Sam likes him. And she does. I want House to know that. I want them both to get along. I hate the tense feeling when we are all in the same room. House really hasn't overstepped, but the tension is still there. And then I simply said it. After House asked if Sam wanted him to move out. No, I said, I want you to move out. Just like that. It was short, sweet and to the point. Not how I'd planned it at all. But looking back, I suppose it was for the best. The direct approach is best with House. He's left now, off on his bike. Maybe to the hospital. He and his team probably have a new case. That has to be it. He's gone to work.

I did what I had to. House knew he would have to move out eventually. We both did. Then why do I feel so damn guilty? I've done nothing wrong. It's my condo, the lease is in my name. Yes, House has helped with all the bills and I never once asked him to. He browbeat me into decorating the place, something it definitely needed. He has been a help, and yes, I've enjoyed him being here. But then I reconnected with Sam. If someone had told me months ago we would be in a relationship again, I'd have thought they were crazy. But this feels right. It feels safe. Familiar even. And I like that feeling. When Sam and I were together, before the whole divorce thing, life was predictable. Our marriage followed a comfortable pattern. I knew what to expect and when to expect it. My friendship with House on the other hand is completely unpredictable. Just when I think I've got it figured out, he throws me a curve. He makes me laugh. He makes me think. I like that too. But to have both Sam's predictability and House's unpredictability in the same space, this condo just isn't big enough for both extremes. And besides House needs to be out on his own again. I'm sure Dr. Nolan would agree. And I'll still be here if he needs me. He's my best friend. After all we've been through, that relationship is pretty solid. I'm not going anywhere. Just need to concentrate on Sam and I for awhile. We are rediscovering each other in a totally new way. I just hope House understands. I'm sure he does.

House has his old apartment. I know he's kept up the lease. A lot of his stuff is still there. No, not THAT stuff. House is through with that. He is done with the vicodin. He has done so well this past year. He has dealt with his pain incredibly well. And, yes, I know he's had some. I've seen him rubbing his thigh when he didn't think I noticed. I heard him pacing the kitchen at 2 AM when he thought I was asleep. I can't even begin to imagine what the pain is like for him. Sure , I know the medical explanation for it, the textbook descriptions of what it's supposed to feel like. I see the way House sometimes stares at the ibuprofen bottle while rubbing his thigh. Does the ibuprofen eliminate his pain as well as the vicodin did? I'm not stupid, of course it doesn't. That makes what he's accomplished this past year an even greater achievement. He's been vicodin free even though the pain is still at the same level it has always been. House has strength. A strength in character and a strength in determination that few give him credit for. To think what I would have lost if we had not met. Does he make me laugh? Never a dull moment! Does he make me think? On so many levels. Does he annoy me? How much time do you have? But each of those things make our friendship what it has become. And what it has become is something unique, long standing and stable. Yes, I used stable and House in the same sentence. Not that I should talk. After three failed marriages, stable is the last thing I should be associated with. But now with Sam, I hope to change that. There's that 'other' word. Change. House doesn't like it and I guess I must admit neither do I. That's why I had such a difficult time decorating this place. I had become so used to Amber's place. It was my 'safety zone' even after she passed. Even more so after I lost her. It was comforting, familiar, warm. But finding the loft helped me bring final closure with everything that happened to Amber and move past it. I felt I had to. House was moving past what had happened to him, I needed to do the same. Together we started a new chapter in our lives and helped each other get through it. It made us stronger and ready to move on. Me with Sam and House back out on his own. I'll always be here for him, just not in the next room. I truly believe this is best for both of us.

So strange for it to be so quiet. A quiet that makes you think. Is this what I really want? Was asking House to leave the right thing to do? Is he ready to be on his own again? And why is House my first thought? I'm trying to make a go of things with Sam and yet the first thing I think of House and his situation. Shouldn't Sam be uppermost in my mind? She is, but House is there too. How could he not be. We have weathered so many storms together. His leg, Stacy, vicodin, Mayfield. My divorces, all three of them. And Amber. You could say we've had one of the longest lasting relationships in my lifetime. Better never let House hear that one. He'd have a field day with it. But I suppose it is true. And now I'm adding Sam once again to the mix. But she's matured. And so have I. We can make a go of this. I want this to work. I want this to be…Fun, and rewarding. Like….damn. Like House and I. Do I really measure my relationships by this? Is House really my 'starting point'? Well, friendship, they say, is the basis for most other relationships. And though I hate to admit this, our friendship is as solid and strong as any I know. If Sam and I can base our relationship on the same principals, then we have a really good chance of making this work. So does that mean I'll have House to thank for our rediscovering each other? In some strange way I guess I will. But one thing I'm not thanking him for is his lack of order. Milk's in the fridge door...again. Maybe I'll leave it there, House would approve. A reminder of the relationship we have. And the one I'm trying to build with Sam. Now on to the dishwasher. House!...


End file.
